A lot of us tend to be there for others, and whilst, of course, that is ok, it’s essential not to get roped into what is known as the ’emotional sponge’, which often means that you tend to soak up others feelings a lot of the time, rather than looking after your own. Most of us are likely guilty of this; whilst it’s OK to be there for the ones you love, it’s equally vital that you take care of your feelings. Taking on so much emotional baggage from yourself and others can be very draining. So, you must be there for yourself, giving yourself room to breathe and not take on too much.
This links to being an empath, and quite often, a few signs link to someone who could be considered an empath. These could be, perhaps, being labelled as too emotional or overly sensitive, feelings can get easily hurt, can often feel quite emotionally drained when in crowds and usually likes spending time alone, might tend to overreact when it comes to coping with emotional stress, quite often can feel genuinely afraid of what could happen. So, you could be similar to the ’emotional sponge’. In that case, an empath is something that you can find ways to help stop you from feeling like you constantly have to soak up others’ feelings, especially when you think you can’t.
1) You have high empathy
Being an empath means you have a lot of empathy; it’s the ability to understand the experiences of others and what others are feeling outside of your perspective. It’s often this feeling of being there for others, making sure they’re okay, and usually taking on their feelings. Empathy is something that allows you to understand what kind of level of pain an individual is going through. Even if you’ve yet to go through what they have, you may still have had a similar experience. But, quite often, if you’re an empath, you tend to take things a little further; you can sense and feel these intense emotions as if they’re part of something you’ve experienced. When someone goes through something, it becomes your pain and happiness, and you begin to feel what they’re feeling.
It’s not all bad being an empath, but it can be very draining if you don’t give yourself room to breathe and, most importantly, check in on yourself. While it’s okay to be there for people you love, try not to take on too much, especially if you’re someone who has a lot going on mentally and you feel pretty stressed and anxious. Taking on other people’s emotions is unfair if you’re struggling. Feeling other emotions can often feel quite a lot to take on, especially if you allow yourself to do it frequently. It’s not just something that can be considered as feeling sorry for someone going through a lot; it’s more about feeling with that person, and whatever they think, you think too.
2) You find it very hard to handle your own emotions
Quite often, when someone is considered an ’emotional sponge’ whilst taking on others’ emotions, they find it challenging to take care of their own emotions. Someone who might find it hard to handle their emotions may see themselves trying their hardest to avoid confrontation. You might suddenly get angry at the littlest things because you’re bottling up your emotions far too much. You might also tend not to feel like yourself in general; when you’re constantly pushing your emotions aside, it may mean you’re in a position that, in a way, put in this kin feels like you’re playing a character of some sort.
It might mean that you’re often using many ways to distract yourself because you don’t want to come you’re feeling. When someone is usually there for others more than themselves, taking care of your own emotions can be challenging. However, it’s also essential that you try your hardest because it’s unfair to neglect how you’re feeling.
3) You have good intuition
Many people considered empaths might often have quite good intuition about certain situations. For someone with good intuition, it often can mean they tend to get that gut feeling when things are specific in their lives or others. For someone with good intuition, it might mean they’re much more empathetic towards others. When they feel like something seems off or something wrong could potentially happen, they will often listen to their ‘gut feeling’ which often means that if they get a bad feeling about anything, they’ll often cut it off right away or give you the advice to do the same thing, so that others don’t get hurt. It could be that they often pick up on any dishonesty.
That feeling, when they might feel something could be a good or a bad idea, is when their good intuition will tend to kick in. Having this means they’re always on the lookout to protect those they care about, and if anything seems off, they will instantly be sure to let others know. Also, having good intuition can mean that you can pick up on other’s feelings a lot easier; you’re a good judge of character; when you think, you think deeply about many things. You tend to have a strong inner voice, often listening to your heart and going with what feels suitable, even when you can’t explain it. Intuitive people usually trust themselves to know what is right for them without thinking too hard about it.
4) You don’t do well in crowded places
Someone considered an empath can often absorb positive and negative energy and can do this just by someone else’s presence. Quite usually, if they’re in somewhere that would be considered crowded and quite busy, it may mean that they become sensitive and quite anxious about the situation and often feel they must take themselves away from it. When they start to pick up on negative emotions, energy, or even physical distress from the people around them, it can often make them feel overwhelmed, anxious and stressed about the situation. Due to this, you feel better being on your own or in the company of a few people at once. Being in a crowded place can often trigger a lot of anxious thoughts, and it is widespread for those considered empaths not to enjoy this.
There are some excellent tips to help calm yourself down if you could do better in crowded places. The best one to start with is to practise your breathing and ensure that you can also be by taking deep breaths and not getting into a panic. Another is to ensure that you learn to increase your awareness; often, when someone finds it difficult to be in crowded places, you focus too much on unpleasant thoughts and fear-based perceptions. Learning to practice mindfulness helps in this situation. Visualising a positive outcome overall, not focusing too much on the negatives of what is happening around you, and trying to focus on the small things that might cheer you up or make you feel better. Take it slow; if you’re highly empathetic and struggle in crowded places, take time to breathe. Give yours, and don’t push yourself too hard.
5) People often tend to tell you their problems
People considered an ’emotional sponge’ or an empath tend to be fantastic listeners and are often quite sensitive. Those around you may feel particularly drawn to you due to this and may feel quite usually that they can talk to you about how they’re feeling and tell you their problems—feeling like they can reach out to you as soon as they experience something difficult. Often, caring deeply can make it quite hard to be able to tell people when you approach the point of feeling overwhelmed. But it’s so important to find some balance within that situation. Without boundaries, you might end up seeing some ’emotional dump’ being forwarded your way that you might not be able to deal with if you have loads of other stuff in your life.
It’s not that you don’t care in the slightest; it’s more so that you’re worried you won’t be able to check in on your emotions and take care of yourself if you have to be there for others, too. Sometimes, it is too much to do, and it’s ok to be honest with yourself and others if you feel that way. Setting boundaries for situations like this is an essential part of self-care and one that matters. It then ensures that you can put yourself first and know that there is absolutely nothing wrong with that because you have to learn to be there for yourself and to take care of your mental well-being before you start doing the same for others.
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