Parent Support and Eating Disorder Recovery
Empowering Families in Eating Disorder Recovery
When a young person is going through an eating disorder, it’s never just their journey; it’s a family journey, too. That’s why understanding parent eating disorders and family roles in recovery is so vital.
Balancing Care and Independence
The Dynamics of Support and Autonomy
When a young person is going through an eating disorder, it’s never just their journey; it’s a family journey, too.
As a therapist working with teens and adults in eating disorder recovery, I see the love, the fear, and the exhaustion that parents and carers carry. You’re the first to notice the subtle shifts. The food was left untouched. The growing distance. The spark that starts to fade.
You want to do everything you can to help.
And you can. Parents and carers play a vital role in supporting recovery, but there’s also a delicate balance between involvement and space. It’s not easy. Especially when your child is young, and you’re used to managing the appointments, speaking to the professionals, and keeping things ticking along.
But in eating disorder therapy, confidentiality is more than just a rule; it’s part of the healing process.
Feeling Overwhelmed? You’re Not Alone
Supporting a loved one through an eating disorder can feel like navigating a storm without a map. The emotional toll, the constant worry, and the uncertainty about the “right” way to help can be incredibly heavy. It’s completely normal to feel overwhelmed, confused, or even helpless.
Remember, you don’t have to face this alone. There are compassionate professionals and supportive communities ready to walk alongside you:
One-to-One Therapy with Anita Gaisford:
- Anita is a specialist eating disorder therapist based in Canterbury. She offers individual support for parents and carers. With experience in both NHS and private settings, she provides a safe space to explore feelings and develop coping strategies. Learn more at We All Need to Talk.
Parent & Carer Support Groups with Jenny Langley
- Jenny facilitates groups with a supportive environment to share experiences and learn practical skills. These sessions can be a lifeline, reminding you that you’re not alone. Find out more at New Maudsley Carers Kent.
Educational Resources from JenUp
- Founded by Jenny Tomei, JenUp provides accessible information and tools to help you understand eating disorders better. It’s a great starting point for parents seeking to educate themselves and support their loved ones effectively. Explore resources at JenUp.
Why your support is so powerful
Let’s be clear: your involvement in recovery is deeply valuable. For teens especially, having a parent or carer who is present, patient, and willing to learn makes a massive difference.
You are part of their environment, and your home routines, meal times, and emotional cues affect recovery. When parents model calm, nonjudgmental support (even when things feel chaotic), it creates a sense of safety that’s essential for healing.
However, your child also needs a space to figure things out for themselves, and therapy is often the only place where that feels possible.
eating disorder help for parents
Why confidentiality is key to trust
When I start working with someone aged 15 or older, I often begin by gently explaining that the therapy room is their space. What we talk about stays between us unless there’s a risk to their safety or well-being.
For many teens, especially those navigating the intense emotional world of an eating disorder, this is the first time they feel in control of something that isn’t harmful.
It doesn’t mean we’re shutting parents out. It means we’re helping them build a relationship with themselves, to learn what their eating disorder is trying to protect them from, what it’s costing them, and what life could look like without it.
If a young person knows that everything they say might be relayed to a parent, teacher, or GP, they’re unlikely to open up about the darker, more painful parts. And those are the parts we need to work with if recovery will be meaningful.
The tension: care vs control
This is often the most challenging part for families. I get it. You love them, are worried, and just want to help.
But eating disorders thrive in secrecy, and they also thrive in control dynamics. If a young person feels that every bit of progress must be explained, justified, or rewarded externally (like “I’ll eat dinner if I can go to that party”), then the recovery becomes something they’re doing for you, not for themselves.
One of my clients recently expressed this in a powerful way:
“I want to get better, but I want to do it in my way, not because people are watching me.”
That doesn’t mean stepping back wholly. It means being emotionally available without needing constant updates. Let therapy be where they learn to speak their truth messily, awkwardly, and sometimes painfully.
how parents can help recovery
Family therapy and wraparound support
Luckily, you don’t have to hold this all on your own.
If your child is working with CAMHS or a specialist eating disorder team, you’ll likely be offered family therapy or multi-disciplinary support. This wraparound care might include:
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Family sessions to explore communication and emotional patterns
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Dietitian guidance on re-nourishment and meal planning
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School support and liaison
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Therapeutic input for both the young person and the family
These services are designed to involve everyone in a way that supports therapy, not replaces it. When everyone understands their role, the recovery process becomes more collaborative and less confusing.
eating disorder parent support group
Support for you: Jenny Langley’s Parent and Carer Group
You might feel like you’re walking a tightrope. One wrong move and things could fall apart. But you’re not alone in this.
Jenny Langley runs a brilliant eating disorder parent support group Parent and Carer Support Group through The New Maudsley Approach. It offers a warm, understanding space for families supporting loved ones with eating disorders. These groups are a lifeline, especially when you feel isolated or unsure.
Whether your child is newly diagnosed or you’ve been on this journey for a while, having a space for your emotions, fears, and questions makes a big difference. You don’t have to be the perfect parent. You have to be a real one, learning and showing up.
Understanding Eating Disorders
What to do when you feel shut out
It can feel heartbreaking not to know what’s going on in therapy. But here’s the truth: therapy is working, even if you can’t see it.
What you can do is focus on creating a home environment that says:
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“You don’t have to be okay all the time.”
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“I won’t make deals about food or freedom.”
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“I trust your therapist, and you’re doing the work in your way.”
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“You are not alone, even when it feels hard.”
That message, spoken or unspoken, lands deeper than any question or check-in ever could.
Becky Stone
I’m Becky Stone, a qualified eating disorder therapist based in the UK. I work with both teens and adults, offering a calm, non-judgemental space to explore what recovery means, on your terms.
With a background in supporting people through anorexia, bulimia, binge eating, and body image struggles, I know how complex and personal this journey can be. My work is shaped by both professional training and lived experience, which helps me connect with clients in a real, honest way.
I specialise in supporting neurodivergent individuals, including those with ADHD and autism, and I believe in flexible, shame-free recovery. I often use tools like the Recovery Record app to help clients track progress in a way that feels empowering, not overwhelming.
At the heart of my approach is trust, trust in yourself, the process, and the idea that recovery is possible. It’s not about perfection. It’s about rebuilding a safe relationship with food, your body, and who you are.
Take the Next Step Towards Recovery
If you’re ready to explore how one-to-one therapy can support you or your loved one through an eating disorder, I invite you to take the first step today. Book a free 15-minute consultation with me to talk through what’s going on and how I might be able to help.
Alongside therapy, you might also find value in joining Jenny Langley’s Parent & Carer Support Group—a safe community for families looking to connect, learn, and feel less alone.
Together, we can create a path that feels right for you, with no pressure, shame, or space to heal.
