Understanding ADHD and Routine Challenges
Why Routines Don’t Work When You Have ADHD
Explore why traditional routines often fail for those with ADHD and discover strategies that align with your unique brain.
Your Brain Isn't Broken
You’re Not Flaky. Your Brain Just Works Differently.
Living with ADHD means your brain processes information and time differently, making it hard to stick to conventional routines. This isn’t a sign of laziness or lack of discipline; it’s simply a different way of functioning. Understanding this can help reduce the stigma and shame often associated with ADHD.
Unveiling Time Blindness
Time Blindness: The Hidden Struggle
If you keep trying to stick to a routine but “fall off the wagon,” you’re not lazy.
You’re likely living with:
➔ ADHD
➔ Executive dysfunction
➔ Time blindness
➔ Chronic shame
It’s not that you can’t follow structure.
It’s that your brain doesn’t relate to time in a typical way.
Time Blindness: The Hidden Struggle
Time blindness is when you can’t reliably feel or predict the passage of time.
So things like:
➔ “I’ll just do this for 5 minutes”
➔ “I’ll start at 7”
➔ “I have loads of time before bed”
…all get distorted. Then shame creeps in. And you begin to think it’s a character flaw.
Why You Keep Procrastinating Bedtime
Your whole day was masked.
You performed. You stayed regulated. You followed the rules.
Now it’s 9 p.m. and your nervous system says:
➔ “I’m not done.”
➔ “I haven’t had any fun.”
➔ “Please don’t make me go to sleep yet.”
So you scroll. Or clean. Or shop. Or binge. And before you know it, it’s 1:30 a.m.
The Real Problem with Routines
Routines fail for ADHD brains because:
-
They’re designed for consistency, not curiosity
-
They’re too rigid for emotional flux
-
They often ignore how your cycle, mood, or executive function shifts day to day
What Actually Helps
Anchor one consistent part of your day (e.g., same wake-up time)
Add “joy cues” to boring tasks (music, movement, reward)
Prep food in pairs, cook once, eat twice
End the day with a dopamine-neutral activity (not scrolling or stress-cleaning)
Use body-based cues, not clocks (e.g., fairy lights = start winding down)
Shame-Free Structure Is the Goal
In therapy, I often ask:
➔ “What part of your day feels safe?”
➔ “Where are you trying to be perfect?”
➔ “What part of your routine could we soften instead of fight?”
You’re not broken. You’re burnt out.
And building routine isn’t about discipline, it’s about designing safety.
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