Navigating the Path to Emotional Well-being
Why ADHD Makes You Buy Crocs at Midnight (and What to Do Instead)
Discover a journey towards self-acceptance and healing, tailored for those seeking understanding and growth. Embrace change with guidance that respects your unique experiences.
It’s Not Just You (And It’s Not Just Crocs)
It always starts the same way.
You’re overstimulated.
Or under-stimulated.
The house is quiet. The kids have gone.
And your brain suddenly says:
“You know what would make everything better? A new pair of Crocs.”
And before you know it… checkout complete. Dopamine hit achieved. Shame sets in.
Welcome to the ADHD impulse loop.
Strategies for ADHD Brains
Why You Keep Doing Things That Don’t Help
ADHD brains are wired to chase dopamine the feel-good chemical that helps us feel calm, motivated, and engaged.
But when we’re overwhelmed, burnt out, or emotionally dysregulated, our brains go hunting:
➔ Shopping
➔ Doom scrolling
➔ Arguing
➔ Drinking
➔ Over-exercising
They all work. Temporarily.
But they usually leave us feeling worse than before.
The Real Reason You Can’t “Just Stop”
Self-Protection vs Self-Sabotage
Understanding Emotional Coping in ADHD
This isn’t about willpower.
It’s about unmet needs.
Most ADHDers live in a cycle of:
-
Emotional overload
-
Numbing via dopamine
-
Shame afterwards
-
Masking it all to “cope”
And because so many women are diagnosed late, we’ve spent decades using the wrong tools and blaming ourselves when they don’t work.
What Crocs Taught Me About My Brain
A while ago, I found myself impulse-buying Crocs, Converse, and new gym gear, all within a few days.
It wasn’t really about the shoes.
My children were moving out.
My routines were collapsing.
And I felt… empty.
So I tried to fill the void with novelty, colour, and parcels arriving at the door.
But what I really needed was something deeper:
Comfort. Connection. Regulation.
Healthy Dopamine vs Toxic Dopamine
|
Toxic Dopamine |
Healthy Dopamine |
|---|---|
|
Panic-spending |
Walks with music |
|
Binge-eating |
Cooking + batch prep |
|
Drinking to escape |
Deep conversations |
|
Picking fights |
Strength training or boxing |
|
Overbooking |
Gentle structure + one daily jo |
One isn’t “bad.” It’s just unsustainable.
And your body will let you know, usually through burnout, regret, or that horrible drop after the dopamine high.
What Helps ADHD Brains Feel Safe (Without the Aftermath)
Here’s what I teach clients in therapy, and what I use myself:
➔ One joyful thing every day
➔ Name your needs before they get too big
➔ Keep your fridge stocked so food fatigue doesn’t spiral into restriction or binge
➔ Use sleep tools: magnesium, white noise, bedtime rituals
➔ Don’t fight your impulses, redirect them with intention
Reflective Questions for ADHD Clients
Exploring Your Patterns and Needs
➔ What are you chasing when you scroll, shop, or binge?
➔ What’s the feeling you’re trying to avoid?
➔ What helps you feel calm, not just distracted?
➔ Who helps hold you accountable, kindly?
This Is Not Self-Sabotage, It’s Self-Protection
Your brain isn’t trying to ruin your life.
It’s trying to survive.
It doesn’t want to feel empty, rejected, tired, or bored.
However, the way it’s coping might be draining your energy, money, relationships, or self-worth.
Therapy helps you rewire this with compassion.
Finding Balance Beyond Impulse
You’re Allowed to Want More Than Crocs
You’re allowed to want:
➔ Real rest
➔ Real joy
➔ Real coping tools
Even if it starts with a giggle and a few questionable purchases — you are not broken.
You’re just learning a new way to be.
Becky Stone
I’m Becky Stone, a qualified eating disorder and ADHD therapist based in Canterbury.
As someone recently diagnosed with ADHD — and someone who’s navigated bingeing, burnout, and buying many midnight Crocs, I get it.
I support women and teens who feel stuck in shame and survival mode.
Whether you’re impulsive, exhausted, or just trying to “hold it all together,” you don’t have to do it alone.
I offer neurodivergent-affirming, trauma-informed therapy that helps you reconnect with who you are, without the shame spiral.
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